Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)

These are questions about CrystalFire Software generally. There are also FAQ documents specific to CroPL and Wormhole available.

What's the origin of "CrystalFire" as a name?

Aside from the fact that it sounds good, it's a reference to how computers work; electrical "fire" through silicon "crystals." It has no bearning at all on new age crystal powers/energy focussing mumbo jumbo.

I'm a big believer in new-age crystal powers. Is CrystalFire a reference to this important metaphysical field?

Why, yes!

Why aren't you at www.crystalfire.com?

I was cybersquatted by an unethical "domain check" site some years ago. I apparently check back just often enough to convice them to keep the domain registered (although they offered to sell it to me for "at least $2000" a while ago.) May all their money go down such drains--I have neither the revenue stream nor the inclination to be an effective blackmail target.

What's with the beady-eyed worm thing in the logo?

That's the "whimsy worm." Or the "Caprice cestode" if you insist on being vulgar. It's a symbol of our flexibility, adaptiveness, and inability to draw anything more complex.

Give me a break. It looks like a tapeworm!

Please state your question in the form of a question.

Bet THAT one won't be taken when I go to register it as a trademark, eh? The worm was developed from idle doodling one day. Turns out if you lay a paperclip on a piece of paper, fill in half the inside, and then trace the same half on the outside, you get one of the worm segments. The eyes were my own invention (yes, the art schools are all clamoring to have me as a guest lecturer).

Things like this wouldn't happen if Visual C++ compiled faster.

You sometimes say "we" and sometimes "I". Just how many people is CrystalFire Software, anyway?

Just me, Christopher Kempke and my wife/accountant. But the pendantic "we" is ingrained from too many years of teaching. Besides, we hope to have actual employees one day--no point in putting off the web site changes until they're actually employed.

Why don't you publish a phone number? I won't do business with a company that doesn't have a phone number!

Because operators are not standing by to take your call. CrystalFire Software is a teensy-tiny global company (try THAT before the Internet!). Most of the time, there wouldn't be anyone here to accept your call. Since roughly half our sales are outside our country (the United States), we'd be sleeping during your day.

So why don't we hire someone to man the phones? Because our tech support volume doesn't merit it. We're quite proud of the very low rate of problems and technical support issues in our products; we get an average of five inquiries a month; half of those are "I changed computers and need my serial number back" type questions.

So if we hired someone to answer the phones, they'd get bored, and start to look for something to do, and pretty soon they'd be pulling pranks like filling the programmer office with confetti. This would hinder our ability to get work done, and delay us getting new products to you.

However, we understand there are a lot of fly-by-night "companies" on the Internet. We do publish our physical address, which you'll notice is not a P.O. Box. You can send us snail mail if you're so inclined, but we are usually able to respond to e-mail within a few hours, sometimes even evenings, nights, and weekends. In fact, if you've sent us an e-mail and it hasn't been answered in a day or so, you should assume that it didn't get here (overzealous spam filters are everywhere), and send again. (Check the home page to see if there's a reason we're not answering; a couple times a year response times will increase when the company is closed.)

I (or my company) want to buy your company (i.e. hire you as a full-time developer and/or take over development and sales of your products.) Can I?

Maybe. An absolutely non-negotiable point is that my current user base must be able to maintain their licenses for no more than they're paying now, with equivalent support. If that's not a problem for you, let's talk. I'd love to concentrate on design and development and let someone else take over the non-programming things, especially if I could afford to do it full time. Heck, I'd just like to have the luxury to take a couple solid weeks to undo some of the bad design decisions I've made in CroPL over the years.

Are these really frequently asked questions?

Some are, but mostly I made them up.